His Presence Over My Purpose

I call to God Most High,

to God who fulfills his purpose for me.

–Psalm 57:2

It’s Not Up To Me

I have put pressure on myself to ‘find my purpose’, as if to discover some great hidden thing. As if it is all up to me (sigh), which thankfully, it is not.

God just asks me to trust Him, He will fulfill His purpose for me. Did you catch the key word there? His purpose not ours. We get to participate as He leads. And we may not see the whole plan at once. That’s part of our journey in trusting God. Just take the first step, then the next, then the next…

Prone To Wander

About four years ago I clearly felt God leading me to write, but I kept asking Him for more information. What was I to write about? What format? Book, articles, blog? But all I got was to simply write. So I kept waiting, seeking, searching for the rest of the plan. Are you seeing my error yet? God told me to write, but I did not trust He was giving me enough information.

I eventually began to write, but inconsistently. I spent more time seeking what to write about, learning about the craft of writing, and searching out writing resources than doing the simple thing God asked me to do. And, hey, most of the resources I sought were ‘Christian’, so that counts, right? Uh, no ma’am. God did not tell me to learn about the Christian publishing field, or to network with other Christian writers, or to find the best Christian writing conferences out there. He did tell me to write. I had subtly shifted my focus from following God’s lead to wandering down my own path.

His Presence is Too Precious to Miss

So here I sit, four years later – writing. Yep, just writing. Struggling to work through this thing. Tuning into God’s gentle guidance. Facing my own weaknesses sends me straight to Him. Knowing I am prone to wander off God’s path, easily distracted by those other trails, reminds me to stay in dialogue with Him, begging Him daily to direct my actions, my thoughts, my time.

Over the past few months, God has given me a greater love for His Word and hunger for His presence. As much as I love to write and share what God is teaching me, I am learning to simply seek His presence before all else. His presence in my life is too precious to miss. I am learning to choose His presence over my plans. His presence over my preparation. His presence over my purpose.